


It Was Always You

by Snow_Queen08



Series: Fandom Imagines and Other Cool Stuff [8]
Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: And wrote this entire thing in the span of 2 hours, Avengers Endgame, Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie) Spoilers, F/M, Goodbyes, Hurt Tony, Hurt Tony Stark, I have a lot of feels ok, I saw the new trailer and cried, Post-Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie), Then I was inspired, Tony Angst, Tony Feels, Tony Stark Feels, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Tony Stark Needs a Hug, Tony-centric
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-08
Updated: 2018-12-08
Packaged: 2019-09-14 10:54:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,300
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16911606
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Snow_Queen08/pseuds/Snow_Queen08
Summary: In what will most likely be the final few hours of his life Tony Stark decided to record one final message for his lover, you.





	It Was Always You

_This thing on._

The freezing cold of space was not an unknown feeling to Tony Stark, constantly dreaming about those brief moments he had spent stranded powerless facing the oncoming Chitarui army when he had flown through the wormhole during the battle for New York, which seemed to him as if it had happened a lifetime ago rather than only six years prior. Those few seconds of utter silence and the feeling of a cold so unimaginable had caused more nightmare and panic attacks than his parents’ death, Afghanistan and his time as Iron Man combined.

_Hey Y/n. If you find this recording don’t feel bad about this._

But despite all of those night that he spent going back and forth between silently crying into his pillow and screaming out like a banshee in his sleep you remained by his side, spending hours sitting next to him on his bed tired beyond belief but never once complaining as you did everything you could to comfort him during such a dark and depressing time in his many years of life.

You were without a shadow of a doubt a beacon of light illuminating his way through the many hardships that he had been forced to go through over the years, and it made him wonder if he would have even survived everything that he had suffered from if you hadn’t been there for him, your words of kindness and hope always helping him get the worst days and your hugs offering him the one place in the entire world where he truly felt safe.

_Part of the journey is the end._

You had walked into his life several months before Afghanistan had occurred, the two of you meeting at a gala where you were working as a photographer and hitting it off right away, similarly to how he and Rhodey had back when he had been a scrawny kid at MIT.

Despite knowing exactly who he was and what he was like you continued to pursue the friendship that was growing between the pair of you, not caring for a moment about his drinking problem or the meaningless sex that he would have practically nightly with anyone who would tickle his fancy, even when he would abandon you at parties so that he could go back to his room with whoever he had been flirting with all night.

Tony didn’t know when it had happened but somewhere down the line the feelings of friendship that he had originally felt for you had blossomed into something far stronger, love. It seemed as though it had happened in an instant but when he looked back it was plain to see that the little things that you would do either around him or for him had added up until he had come to realise that you were the most important person in his life and couldn’t bear the thought of living without you.

_Just for the record, being adrift in space with zero promise of rescue is more fun than it sounds._

Perhaps it was the way that you always listened to his scientific and engineering babble despite not understanding any of it that finally tipped the scale, your attention always on him even when he went on tangents about matters that had absolutely nothing to do with what he had originally been talking to you about. 

Or maybe it was how you never asked for anything from him like almost everyone else in his life had, never taking advantage of the fact that he was a Stark or a billionaire even though you knew that he would happily give you access to his black credit card if you ever wanted it, in fact the only time you had ever asked anything of him was after you had been evicted from your old apartment by your crooked landlord, asking if you could stay with him for a few days until you found yourself a new place and outright refusing to let him buy you a new apartment when you were having trouble finding one in your price range.

_Food and water ran out four days ago._

Or maybe, just maybe, it was your smile that had finally made him realise that he was in love with you. Not the typical smile that you would give Rhodey every time he told a joke no matter how terrible, nor the smile that you would share with Happy whenever the two of you watched Downton Abbey together or even the smile you had on your face when you returned with Pepper after going on out for the day.

No, this smile was for him alone and it made him seem like a fool for not noticing it sooner, how your smile full of joy that seemed to be permanently on your face whenever he was around secretly hid behind it the immense feelings of love that you felt for him and had been keeping to yourself ever since you had met him all those years ago.

_Oxygen will run out tomorrow. And that’ll be it._

How was it that one of the most intelligent men on the planet hadn’t been able to figure out that you had been in love with him for years, it made him feel so stupid that he hadn’t noticed sooner and it pained his heart knowing that the two of you could have spent those long years of friendship as something more just like you had been doing ever since the ‘Civil War’.

It was during his darkest moment after the fight in Siberia when Tony at last realised that he had fallen in love with you long ago, his thoughts solely on you as he laid there inside of that cold bunker unsure if he would ever make it out alive, hoping and willing to give up absolutely everything that he owned along with all of his intelligence and the prospect of being Iron Man once again if it meant that he could see your face one last time and confess his feelings to you.

And he would happily give it all up again now if it meant that he could make it back to Earth and find you waiting there for him to return, to run to you and pull you into his arms so that he could feel safe once again, to hear his name on your lips before feverously kissing you with every ounce of love that he felt towards you and to hear you say that you loved him one final time before he kicked the bucket at last.

_When I drift off, I will dream about you._

But he knew that seeing you again was nothing but a beautiful dream, he was adrift in space after all with no way out and only death in sight. He would never be able to hear the happiness that flowed through your voice as you told him about your day ever again, he would never spend another lazy afternoon just lying on the couch watching shitty movies with you wrapped up in his arms and most of all he would never see that wonderful smile that you reserved for him alone one final time.

But before the oxygen ran out and he at last left this world for whatever might await him after death he would leave you one finally message, after all if you couldn’t tell him that you loved him one final time then at least he would tell you,  hoping that if he was ever found by someone in the darkness of space that they would deliver his recording to you on Earth so that you knew that even in his final moments he would be thinking of you, always of you.

_It’s always you._


End file.
